Which Disiz album are you?

It’s almost summer, and who says summer says sun, coconut palms and Paris Plage, and therefore magazines to leaf through in the sand, with endless multiple choice questions to try to determine what type of person you are, whether as a couple, at work, on vacation, at school, etc. This week, we invite you to determine which Disiz album you correspond to. The rapper indeed had the merit of reinvent itself almost with each project, each time revealing a different facet of his personality. Are you more L’Amour or Rap Machine? Ghetto Sitcom or Carré Bleu?

And as the technology does not allow it, it is you who will have to count your answers. Sorry, but on the other hand, that’s also the hip-hop spirit.

A: You scream, you tear your hair out, you run in the rain until you collapse.
B: You stop going to concerts. Moreover, this disillusion pushes you to question your whole existence: tomorrow morning, you become single again, you resign and you move to the other side of the world.

C: You try to distract yourself by going to see a one-man show or a comedy at the cinema

D: You replace the evening listening to rap in a concert hall with an evening listening to rap through headphones

E: This failed evening is just another proof of your relationship’s poor health: ok, Disiz’s absence has nothing to do with it, but that doesn’t prevent you from putting away your loose socks.

A: You refuse to answer him: the world of work revolts you, you slam the door and leave the agency screaming.

B: You are hesitating between resuming studies in a field a thousand miles from your background, and retraining for a profession that does not suit you at all.

C: You are aiming for an accountant position but the advisor would see you as a sketch author.

D: Sound engineer, beatmaker, music journalist, Jul’s bodyguard: it doesn’t matter, as long as it’s related to rap.

E: You ask your counselor if she’s available tonight, because well, you’re divorced now and therefore open to meeting new people and… no, but that’s ok, I was kidding, don’t call the social security. But let me go, damn it!

Following a bad manipulation, the complete discography of Disiz disappears from streaming platforms for 24 hours. Which alternative are you turning to?

A: You start by throwing your phone against the wall, before sending an inflammatory email to Spotify customer service. Then you listen to Antisocial, from Trust, on repeat all day.
B: You immerse yourself in the discography of Frankie Knuckles.
C: You go back to basics with NTM and IAM, with intermissions to redo the albums of Les Inconnus and Fatal Bazooka.

D: Haroun, Furax Barbarossa, Hugo TSR, Lacraps: you like dense verses, rich rhymes, in short, pure and hard rap for the brave.

E: No problem, you launch your “aftermaths of rupture” playlist, a safe bet.

Kitchen level:

A: Chilli, harissa, wasabi, mustard, pepper: it doesn’t matter as long as it’s hard.

B: You often want to change, to upset your habits, to discover dishes that you do not know.

C: You just want a salty Mc Morning, you know, the one with the egg.

D: Nothing better than the good old traditional cuisine, the one from your childhood, the one we cook today because there is more than industrial food my good lady.

E: “Anyway, I’m the one who cooks every night, you don’t give a damn and on top of that you complain about what I’m cooking, I should have listened to my mother”.

Your favorite movie:

To: Godzilla

B: From Dusk till Down (A night in hell in VF)

C: The King of Comedy (La Valse des Pantins)

D: BeatStreet

E: Revolutionary Road (Rebel Wedding)

Every morning, you start your day with a philosophy:

A: You have to let yourself be guided by your emotions, including the negative ones.

B: What matters is breaking all the codes, never letting society dictate your choices.

C: You have a “Ghetto Philosopher” badge. and the baggage of the guy who saw it all.

D: Rap was better before, when it was rap.

E: Marriage is a prison, finished paying my debt to society.

At McDo, they refuse to serve you a McMorning, when you asked at 11:59:

A: You stand on the counter, yell nonsense, and smash the drink machine that serves watered-down Coke.

B: You change your plans and go to Chinese

C: You remember the story and make it a hit single

D: Impossible, you never go to McDo, this ultimate symbol of capitalism that you denounce in your 16 bars at each open-mic.

E: None of this would have happened if your better half had made you breakfast this morning. Really the life of a couple, what hell.

How did you react to the announcement of the first confinement, in March 2020?

A: A feeling of anger towards the political decision makers, the guys who said it was just a big flu, the pangolins, bats, and other alleged culprits, Western society, progress, technology, the Planet Earth, and even the entire Universe, like.
B: It’s an opportunity to change your way of life, to experiment with new things, and why not to rebuild a different society by making a clean sweep of the past.
C: Pangolin, bat, mink… what if it wasn’t all about a fucking goldfish?
D: You spent six weeks video freestyling with your friends.

E: Cohabitation with your other half was a terrible ordeal.

For the next holidays:

A: Japan, towards Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
B. A change of scenery objective: you want to see new settings, taste new dishes, breathe a different air.

C. One foot in France, one foot in SenegalI.
D: New York, Queensbridge.

E: You leave alone, no more traveling as a couple.

Results

You have a majority of A’s: You are Disizilla. You have a lot of anger to express, for many different reasons: fear, disease, society, the university system, racism… You need to rebel, to shout to the world that it is unfair, and even if you can’t do anything about it, expressing it without restraint does you the greatest good.

You have a majority of Bs: You are in the belly of the crocodile. You need change in your life, you would like to erase everything and start over on a blank canvas. You experiment, you take one road, then another, not quite sure which way to go. Don’t worry: you won’t get lost along the way, and this experience will help you get to know yourself better.

You have a majority of C: You are Le Poisson Rouge. You tackle serious, sometimes even gloomy themes, you do introspection, and you have a lot of respect for the culture in which you are immersed. However, everyone only remembers you when you tell a little funny stories, and we see you as the comedian on duty. Good luck breaking that label.

You have a majority of Ds: You are Rap Machine, a big fat back to basics. You like pure and hard rap, the one where it kicks, the one that performs. Singing, ballads, melody, toplines, very little for you.

You have a majority of E: You are The Love. Your life is marked by romantic separation, you need a fresh start. In terms of mood, you can be as playful in form as you are dark in substance. Both freed from certain heavy constraints, and alone facing an unknown future, you don’t really know what the rest will look like.

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Which Disiz album are you?


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